Sunday, December 4, 2011


It's a cold grey Sunday. Jim is at work so we couldn't get to church. So he's had a 7 day work week & will still have to work at least the next 5, probably the next 6, as he more often than not has to work Saturdays. He's working like a dog, yet we're barely making it. Normally, I have a pretty good attitude toward the whole $ thing, but today, not so much. I'm frustrated cuz I feel trapped & deprived. Yes, I know I should be thankful that for now anyway, we have a place to live, food, transportation, good health, and he has a job. That's a lot more than many many people throughout the world possess. And I am thankful for that stuff. It's just that there are things I want to do to move forward in life ,and the cold hard truth is that some of those things require $. There's only so much you can do & so far you can go for free. Take this whole Advent thing that I wanna do as a family. I need a few supplies. Nothing major. Could get what I need for under $10, probably even under $5, but we are so strapped, I can't even do that. I just hate that feeling of knowing that I can't even have one little thing that I'd like. Yes, I'm whining, but it's my blog. Better to get it out here than go bite someone's head off. I guess I just feel kinda stuck. Payday isn't til Thursday & by then we will be so many days behind in Advent that there probably isn't any point in trying to do the book cuz it would be awfully hard to catch up by Christmas, though maybe if we did 2 days worth each night til we're up to the right date that might work. OK I guess that would work. Well, that makes me feel a little better. Still frustrated though cuz shallow as it is, sometimes a girl just wants to know she has the option of buying a latte. Even if she doesn't exercise that option, there's just something about knowing she COULD get it that makes her feel better. Guess I wouldn't have made a very good pioneer or missionary. What can I say? Camping does NOT appeal to me. Coffee, hot showers & epidurals for childbirth do.

Yesterday, I got the bathroom mostly cleaned up, which was a HUGE improvement over how it looked before I started. I'm not quite done though, so my plans for today in addition to the usual will be to finish up in there. I need to clean the baseboards. (I didn't realize til I got in there yesterday just how grimy they are) Also sweep & mop the floor, & though I can't buy new towels at this juncture, I can look online & decide what I want anyway so that when I can get them, I'll be ready.

Tonight I'm making pork chops with an apricot glaze, coleslaw & applesauce. So hey, we may not have cash flow, but we can still enjoy a yummy dinner. It's not like we're starving or even eating Ramen & beans (which btw my kids would think is great anyway lol). OK well time to tweak my tude & get things in gear & do my Bible study & cleaning & not let the dreary winter greyness color my soul. Joy is a choice.

Ruby Tink :-)


  1. Hey friend...hope you are feeling a bit better today. We were shopping not long ago (for stinkin essentials) and I saw something that caught my eye. I walked on and didn't even pick it up but started tearing up. Ernie make me explain what was wrong and that was even harder, because I know exactly what we have to spend and when we can't do that extra stuff. It feels selfish and dumb and it's hard, but just saying that I understand. You are absolutely right, joy and contentment are choices.


  2. Thanks. I hesitated even sharing this stuff cuz I KNOW it's shallow & silly esp in the scheme of eternity or even in the light of all the terrible things going on in the world. But it's just kinda where I'm at in the moment. I don't think it makes me a horrible, terrible, evil person.

  3. Right there with you Annette. We're having to cut back as our total income is being cut and we're just barely making it. Down to one vehicle now as the car isn't worth fixing and no money for another one. So now we're spending three times the amount for gas. And now we can no longer get milk from the farm. I can't do milk or yogurt from the store. We were making our own yogurt. If anything else goes wrong here, I just might scream or buy a one-way ticket to a nice warm place. Oh wait, can't do that, it takes money!